Radiating Sunshine: Be With Someone Who Helps Your Being

Wednesday, January 14, 2015

Be With Someone Who Helps Your Being

Throughout my life I feel like I have "wasted" a lot of time with people who have not made me a better person. I put "wasted" in quotations, because obviously I learned a lot from those friendships and (or) relationships. But, seriously for awhile I just surrounded myself with negative people and people who just did not have the same interests that I did. 

So, when I got to college I decided I would work really hard to (a) discover who I am and (b) surround myself with people who are just good people. You're probably thinking... "why did it take her until college to make that decision" and to answer your thought it's hard to discover your identity in middle or high school. I have done both of my senior capstone projects on emerging adulthood and identity development, so I kind of have an understanding on how students discover themselves. 

Lately, I have had a lot of conversations with friends and residents and I have had to help them realize that you don't just wake up one day knowing exactly who you are, what you want to do with your life, what you like, how you feel about social issues, what type of people you want to associate with. It can definitely be easier for some people to discover these things but, I definitely believe that in most cases you don't just instantly know. Why? Because life is always throwing your curve balls and making you rethink things. 

As you discover who you are and what you want out of life, you can start creating friendships with others who bring out the best you. Life is way too short to waste time with people who make you want to be someone your not. I feel like often times we are just so focused on comparing ourselves to others, when really we should be focusing on how great we already are. 

 As I stated previously in college I have tried to surround myself with people who bring out the best me. I have made so many friendships and have lost friendships too. But, I think one of the most important friendships I have made, that I really value and am thankful for is my friendship with Josh. I feel like it can be rare when you find someone you can just be silly with. I have found that I'm a better listener, I'm more understanding, and I'm more giving with Josh in my life.

So, who in your life brings out the better you? Is it a significant other? A best friends? A pet? Whoever it is, make sure you always remember to value them. Because surrounding yourself with someone who makes you a better you or as Rumi says "be with someone who helps your being" is seriously the best way to go!


  1. I just love this post. It's so true, and in my opinion, it really does take until college to start surrounding yourself with "good" people. You get a fresh slate. Looks like you've done a great job of that!

    1. Thanks Meg! I would argue you have too!!

  2. I love this post!! I totally agrew with being around good people and not around people who bring you down or are not good influences!!

    1. Amy, it is so important. Sometimes I feel like it can be forgotten :/


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